A Look Back: Psychology 101 with Linda at the Maryland Horse and Soul Tour

One year ago yesterday, I received a much anticipated phone call from someone at Parelli Central. I had been selected to participate in a demo with Linda Parelli at the Maryland Horse and Soul Tour Stop. The session was called "Psychology 101" in which Linda took four students, each with a horse representing one of the Horsenalities, and showed them how to use Psychology to bring out the best in their horse. Below is a blog post that I had written about my experience as part of the demo which I had not published until now...Enjoy!

I wouldn’t normally consider myself to be a very spontaneous person, however my recent confidence with my horse, Rydel, led me to throw caution to the wind, step out of my comfort zone, and apply for a chance to participate in the 2013 Horse and Soul Tour stop in Upper Marlboro, Maryland. While I had the opportunity to choose from an array of different demonstrations or lessons with Pat and Linda, there seemed to be only one obvious choice for my horse and me: Horsenality 101 with Linda.

I have had my horse for nine years. Several months before purchasing her, my 4-H group had received free tickets to a Parelli Tour Stop.  After watching Pat and Linda from the stands, I was instantly hooked. I convinced my parents to purchase the level one pack and watched and studied as much as I could until I finally got a horse of my own. From the day I brought Rydel home, I began putting the Parelli principles I had learned in that level 1 pack to purpose and I truly believe it was this prior knowledge that kept me safe around what I later learned to be a very right brained horse. Everyday, I would go out to play the seven games with my horse, but something seemed to be missing. When I would ask her to back up, for example, she would freeze, and when I increased my phases and added more pressure, rather than responding appropriately, she would absolutely explode! We struggled on like this for a few years, and just when I was about to give up, the concept of Horsenality was introduced, and my whole world changed! Suddenly, I had arrows in my quiver to deal with my very extreme Right Brain Introvert, and the amount of progress we made in such a short period of time amazes me even to this day.

Having impacted the relationship with my horse in such a dramatic way, it is easy to see why getting a chance to demonstrate Horsenality was so important to me, and when I received the call that Rydel and I would be in the show, I was ecstatic that everything was coming full circle. When the big weekend finally arrived, I was so concerned with making sure my horse was ready for the show, and so focused on being able to demonstrate how truly wonderful these Right Brain horses can be, that I wasn’t taking a step back to focus on myself. The day of the show the lack of self-focus hit me like a ton of bricks and I began feeling uncontrollably nauseous. As I groomed and prepared my horse for our big debut, it took every ounce of energy I had to not collapse from the amount of retching my stomach was doing. Every deep breath I took, and every attempt I made to talk myself into walking into that arena seemed futile as I slipped more and more into a state of panic.  Finally, after no longer being able to hide my emotions, I burst into tears in a small room behind the retail booth and received some much needed mental coaching (read: friendly game of the mind).

At what seemed like the very last minute, I composed myself and Rydel and I walked into the arena with Linda Parelli and the other horses and humans who would be represented in the demo. In the ring, my worries melted away and I was able to just have fun with my horse. Linda took each horse in turn to demonstrate each Horsenality to the crowd. Rydel was the perfect example of an extreme Right Brain Introvert and Linda talked about and demonstrated the importance of managing your energy when playing with these types of horses. Ladies and gentlemen, cue the licking and chewing!

Principle number seven states that “horses teach humans” and this tour stop was a great reminder of that principle for me. When I submitted my application to be a part of a demonstration on Horsenality, I assumed I would learn a lot about my horse. In reality, being a part of a demonstration on Horsenality helped me learn a great deal more about my own personality than I ever would have imagined! Because of this experience, I now feel more equipped to deal with my own emotions, especially in new or stressful environments, and to be the leader my horse needs me to be all the time, even if when means admitting my limitations and seeking out support. I am so grateful to have a horse that teaches me something new at just the right moments, and I am even more grateful to have the support of the Parelli community to lean on when it’s me who needs a lesson in becoming calm, cool, and collected. 

Rydel at the fairgrounds, relaxing after the show!

Have You Seen Our New Page?

Hey there!

Have you seen our new page? It's called "Naturally Curly" and it's about Rydel's pasture mates, Lilah and Sailor, the American Bashkir Curly Horses. Check it out by clicking on the tab at the top of this page or by clicking here.

Accept The Saddle

When starting a young horse, the first step is to accept the human, the second step is to accept the saddle. This is a step that has taken a lifetime for my seventeen year old mare. I have written previously about how Rydel came to me with a great fear of saddles and saddling, and it took me a few months to reintroduce the saddle to her as something benign. Unfortunately, while I was trying to teach my horse how saddles can be good things, I was also learning about saddle fit at the exact same time. Through a long process of trial and error with different types and sizes of saddles, I learned a lot at the expense of my horse's back. Even when I thought I was doing it all by the book (wider treed saddle with special pad and shims) it only took a few months before my horse ended up sore backed and ready to bite me when she saw me coming with  my saddle to ride. So, I knew something had to change, and fast!

After months of research (and taking a break from riding to heal my horse's back), I decided that Freeform saddle's were the way to go. My horse was getting sore with every treed saddle I tried, so I knew that I wanted to try treeless, but I also knew that not all treeless saddles are created equally and choosing the right one was very important. Research pointed me to Freeform every time as the obvious choice for quality and science. Tests showed Freeform saddles to have even weight distribution due to the special process in which they are made. A few years ago, the winner of the Tevis Cup (the 100 mile long grueling endurance race) rode in a Freeform and passed every single vet check along the way. I was convinced, I needed to try one.

In February of last year, I purchased my very own Freeform saddle for Rydel, and the difference was remarkable! My horse no longer tries to bite me when I saddle up and she never bucks or balks when I ask her to change gait. When I get off, she doesn't dip her back in pain, and I am forever grateful that we found something that works for us.

Trying on the Freeform

After a year of riding in the Freeform, I am still amazed at how well my horse is doing with it. However, last night, something even more incredible happened. We recently got a new horse, and while I was over helping my boyfriend ride bareback for the first time, I left Rydel saddled up, with the reins tied up so she wouldn't get herself tangled. I could tell she was relaxed, so I had no problem leaving her untied to wait for me to return. Well, the next thing I know, she started to act like she was going to roll...with my saddle still on her! As you can see in the video below, my first reaction was to think "NOOOOO, that saddle costs more than you do, silly horse!" Sadly, I was so dumfounded by her willingness to roll, that I didn't think to turn the camera to start filming her.

(It's the audio in this video that matters)

But after watching my horse roll in the snow and straight over onto her back with my Freeform saddle still attached to her body, I realized how truly big of a deal this event was. First, my horse has never been confident enough to roll in an arena full of people, let alone to be confident with the saddle enough to feel comfortable rolling in it!

I have no words to describe how amazing it feels to know that my horse finally accepts the saddle, and to know that I (with the help of Freeform) was able to help her overcome her anxiety and years of baggage to be truly comfortable wearing her saddle and to be the best partner immaginable!

Sunday Funday: Sledding With Horses!

Today I got the chance to scratch something off my horsey bucket list. The weather has been absolutely horrible thanks to the polar vortex of doom here in the US. However, today we decided to take advantage of the snow and play with something new. Yesterday, one of the girls at our barn decided it would be fun to hook her ponies up to a harness and have them pull a sled. After hearing about it and seeing the videos, of course I wanted to try it with my two horses!

With this plan in mind, I started my session with Rydel with a lot of friendly game. My ultimate goal was to get her to be able to drag something behind her confidently. I have to say, when I pulled the tarp out (after conveniently stashing it away all winter), Rydel's snorts and skepticism quickly had me thinking this was not going to be as easy as I had initially anticipated. After playing various versions of the friendly game in every zone for about a half hour, Rydel was still not very confident having the tarp or bag dragged behind her. Sensing the need to retreat, I decided to take a break and focus my attention elsewhere. After a short but sweet time at liberty, I decided to hop on Rydel bareback and watch as my fellow barn-mates took turns having their horses pull the sled. After some more friendly game following them around on horseback and of course, after I took a turn riding in the sled myself, I decided to bite the bullet and put the harness on Rydel. I wanted to see how she would react, and I was basically prepared for the worst.

At first, Evan stayed behind and put a little pressure on the rope while I lead Rydel around. Once we got the hang of that, I had Evan get in the sled and led Rydel again. I was AMAZED at how well she did. She really seemed to understand the purpose and even leaned into the harness to give herself more leverage. Before I knew it, we were trotting around and having a great time! We played with this with both Rydel and Lilah and they both did great! Even though we were having a lot of fun, we kept our playtime short, sweet, and successful, knowing that we would definitely be practicing with the sled again.

At the end of our playtime with the sled, Rydel let out a big yawn and had a big emotional release. I could not be more proud of the confidence she demonstrated today, and I am even more humbled that she so willingly accepted my leadership and attempted something scary that she had never done before. What a great way to end the weekend!

What is on your horsey bucket list?

Completely Confident: Creating A Confident Horse in 5 Areas

Lilah Rose is confident in herself, naturally curious, and always in you face!

As an owner of a right brained horse who is naturally inclined to be insecure, I think and talk about building confidence a lot. However, what does it really mean to have a truly confident horse? How do we know that we are setting our horse up for success in every situation? These are questions that I didn't even know to ask until recently.

A few months ago, we moved the horses to a new barn that is much closer to where we live. Prior to the move, we had been dealing with some serious separation anxiety between our two horses. Whenever we would take one out of sight of the other, they would get very right brained and emotional, especially our curly horse, Lilah. Now, after enduring the tribulations of being uprooted, our horses are more bonded than ever. Just when I was starting to feel lost about how to approach dealing with the times we want to separate our horses, I happened to pick up and watch a DVD that was a game changer for the way I think about my horse's confidence and is the key to tackling the separation anxiety.

In the video, Linda Parelli matter-of-factly explained that as a good horse person, it is my responsibility to  build my horse's confidence in five areas:

1) In myself as a leader
2) In his or herself
3) In the herd
4) In the environment
5) In learning situations

Say it with me now - "Hmm, how interesting!" I had never thought about gaining my horse's confidence in each of these areas before. In fact, now I understand why it is possible for our very left brained curly horse, who is very confident in herself, to be unconfident in new environments, because we really haven't focused on building her confidence in this area specifically. Additionally, I want to point out that the areas of confidence are compounding. For example, in a familiar environment, with the herd around, and me as a leader, my horse might have total confidence. But in a new environment, without the security of the herd, my horse might lose confidence in me as a leader, and if he is not confident in his own ability to take leadership, then you might have a mess on your hands. This is not the greatest example, but hopefully you get the idea of how each area of confidence has the potential to impact the others. You cannot ignore the ones that pose challenges. Alternatively, you can utilize your strengths to aid you in the areas in which your horse has less confidence.

It is our job to build our horse's confidence in each area to help our horse become more mentally and emotionally centered.

Eventually, if I've done my job correctly, my horse will have confidence in me as a leader, and in himself which will allow him to have confidence in our herd of two in any environment or learning situation. It is my challenge to you to work on building confidence in each of the five areas, I know I will be!

Positive, Progressive, and Natural!

As we ring in 2014, I cannot get away with not talking about my goals for this new year. I have decided to set myself up for success this year and keep my goals simple and attainable. I was recently reading 3-Star Parelli Instructor, Jake Biernbaum's newsletter in which he reminded me to keep working on my horsemanship, keeping the phrase "positive, progressive, and natural" in mind. What a perfect theme on which to base my goals for 2014 (thanks, Jake)!

2014 Horsemanship Goals

1) Seek out more support to keep a positive attitude throughout my journey

2) Teach my horse something new every month to stay progressive

3) keep it natural, always!

What are your horsemanship goals for 2014? Feeling stuck? Take a look at the eight principles below to help you generate ideas!

Note: This photo is property of Parelli Natural Horsemanship.